Man, owww, man! It’s time to get the fucking lube warmed up, and turn on Greta Van Susteren! It seems that new developments in the Natalee Holloway case has lead the cops to re-arrest Joran van der Sloot, Satish, and Deepak Kalpoe! Of course, I’m totally stoked to see that justice will be served, but more importantly it means that the news stations will start reporting again on this missing hottie. That was the coolest story in the history of cable news stations. Every 15 mins they plastered the screen with videos and images of a smoking hot [dead] chick. While I never personally waxed my knob to the stories, I know a guy that did all the time. He’d hit mute and rock ‘n roll. Honestly, I think I might just give it a whack. I mean, come on. That bitch was hot.
I think the only thing that would be cooler than her killers being punished would be if she turned up alive, and decided to move to Cleveland, Ohio. Of course, then I’d end up facing rape charged. It might just be worth it!